Hey Foxy Lady

You’re looking really nice today. I like your outfit. Like your style. That’s a cute suit with your pointy-toed shoes. Your hair looks so nice. Your makeup is perfectamundo.

But why do you have to carry that huge, fake Louis Vuitton bag? It doesn’t look real at all. […] Continue Reading…

Party Bears

Whenever I come out of this one guy’s office at work, I end up face-to-face with this weird-ass painting of a bunch of bears. Actually, I think it’s a reproduction. But still. There are, like, a thousand bears dancing in the forest. The ones who aren’t dancing are […] Continue Reading…

Recipe for Fun

1. Go to CostPlus World Market and buy a $10 jar of salt scrub. I like the Peppermint Rosemary one. If you take someone with you, that person might wrinkle her nose at the generic-looking packaging of your jar and say, “Why don’t you just go to […] Continue Reading…

I talk funny.

Almost a year ago, I spoke on a panel for a UH Women’s Studies’ program. It was called Youth Culture. There was a woman from a record company, a community activist, and me. I represented life on the web. I remember that my comments made the audience […] Continue Reading…

Makeover

If you’re a regular reader, you’ll see that this site looks different now. I accidentally totally messed up the old template, so I had to replace it with this one.

Also, I’m trying comments for the first time. Feel free to comment, but keep in mind that I’ll delete comments […] Continue Reading…

Thanks

Thanks to everyone who wrote in with advice on contacts. After thoroughly cleaning the contacts and making sure they weren’t inside out or on the wrong eyes, I tried them one last time. They were still wrong, and I have very dry eyes. Y’all unanimously decided that Dr. Stuettger […] Continue Reading…

Contacts
(This update is for Kay.)

I finally broke down and went to get contact lenses.

I went to the same doctor who sold me my glasses almost three years ago. Back then, he was a nice guy with a slightly nerdy sense of humor. Now, he’s silent. Taciturn. Saturnine.

I’m one of […] Continue Reading…

My son is more observant than I was at his age.

The other day we were at a department store looking for a dress for me to wear on an upcoming occassion. My two younger sons were being bad so I put them on the floor in a corner near […] Continue Reading…

I am the nicest fucking bitch you will ever know.

“I’ll do this for you… IF you’re nice to me.”

What does nice mean? Well, that depends.

In the old black and white movies in which women cry and men leer, it usually means “accessible for sexual favors”.

In certain offices and […] Continue Reading…

more on the Iraq prank photo

Thanks to Cheryl B for sending me this link with an alternate version of the photo mentioned in the previous post. Is the more flattering photo real, though? If it is, why does the article linked below cite disciplinary action considered? And wouldn’t you […] Continue Reading…