The truth I’ve known since I was a teenager, now broken down and shared with those of you Americans who somehow never learned it…
You vote Republican if you’re rich. You vote Democrat if you’re not rich.
Personally, I don’t think there’s any shame in rich people wanting to keep what’s theirs. Wouldn’t you want to?
The shame comes in when the Republicans convince the stupider and more prudish/intolerant non-rich people to vote Republican for “moral” reasons.
Republicans are gay. They cheat on their spouses. They have abortions. They say bad words. Just like Democrats.
Maybe you’re such a racist that you hate all Middle Eastern people and you love having America’s youth flown over there to fight them like some big football or video game, whether or not the people getting killed ever did anything to you. Even though Bush started the war for money, and not because he hates the brown people like you do. And maybe that’s why you’re voting for Bush – because your hatred of the brown people surpasses all financial concerns.
If that’s the case, I can’t reason with you. But I just wanted to tell everyone else that if you’re not rich or racist against Middle Eastern people, there’s no reason to vote for Bush. He can’t stop gayness or abortions. No one has EVER stopped that. Don’t get confused. Just vote Democrat until you get rich. After you get rich, switch over to Republican.
Seriously. Take it from me. I’ve been living here my entire life and I love all of y’all. I’m not a politician, so I wouldn’t lie to you. Vote Republican if you’re rich. Vote Democrat if you’re not rich.
And I’ll let you know if that guideline ever changes.
