The Anal Sex Anecdote
Okay – apparently I was too enigmatic in the entry before last, because everyone’s asking me, “Uh, why the hell were you talking about anal sex on a first date?”
First of all, I have no class and I will talk about anything, with anyone.
There. Now that that’s squared away…
I was telling my friend Simon that, in my experience, there are two questions that certain men will always try to indirectly ask the women they’re dating. I said that a certain type of man will go to all sorts of lengths and make up various clever ways to find out the answers. He said he didn’t know what two questions I meant.
Do you know which two questions I mean?
Cover your eyes if you’re squeamish.
1. “Does she go down?” [variant: “Does she spit or swallow?”]
2. “Does she do anal?”
I was telling Simon about a certain nefarious character who’d thought of a very clever way to ask said questions. This man had told me a long sob story about how his feminist poetry discussion group (!) had gotten into a debate, and in the debate, the more feminist of the members had declared that oral and anal sex were oppressive to women.
Then the guy followed that with, “What do YOU think of that, Gwen?”
So, I thought that story was funny. And so I told it to Simon. And if that shocks you, then I guess you just don’t know me as well as you thought. You’re resilient, though. You’ll get over it.
