ha, ha, I told you
My fate has flipped back in the other direction like a fish flicking in a tank.
Or maybe my life’s always the same and I just perceive it differently depending on my blood-sugar level.
Did I tell y’all the name of my book? It’s called To the Last Man I Slept with and All the Jerks Just Like Him. Spicy, isn’t it? I didn’t pick that name — my publisher did. It’s the title of one of the stories. But my publisher really knows what he’s doing because ever since he picked that name, people have been way more interested than they used to, when it was just called Love and Animals like I’d originally planned it.
“No, it’s not about bestiality,” I’d say.
“Oh,” they’d say. “Huh.”
But now, with the new spicy title, the women say, “It’s called what? Oh, I don’t care… I’m gonna buy it right now! Do you have one on you?”
And the men say, “Oh. Huh.”*
And of course the book’s not printed yet. But email me your snail-mail address if you want to know when it is.
* No, I don’t hate men. I love them. I love them too goddamned much.
